Angry GameFAQs Review Of The Day (3/31)

Today’s winner concerns an obscure title by the name of GoDai: Elemental Force for the PS2. More oddly, you might notice, is that the writer — shouting comfortably from his recliner of rage — seems to have a bit of an age-complex. See if you can sniff it out, too, or if we’re just high on angel dust (or all of the above). Bolding is ours:

Back in the old days, kids didn’t need too much of an excuse to play games… times have changed. Don’t get me wrong here. I don’t figure to sound like an old has-been drumming up the way things were. All I’m getting at is that today, we’re lucky, because there’s as many choices in games as there is fruit in Florida. And if a game stinks, it stinks. You don’t sit around for hours on end, whittling away those fleeting seconds of youth, working out the problems of a glitchy game simply because there’s nothing else around… On a good day, I spend three bucks on soda-pop, so what was the risk in throwing down on a game? I forgot that plum bottom rule they always teach you right off: never, but, never judge a book by its cover… The story was basic, but that’s a draw for me. If I want a great work of story telling, I’ll read Moby Dick… [And] the graphics? If the cover art is to be believed, the graphics are dynamite.

Old has-been? You? I mean, how could a such an obvious hipster like yourself, who’s “whittling” and “drinking” “soda pop” down in “Florida”, using cool hip-hop slang like “plum bottom”, “dynamite”, “it stinks” and “never judge a book by its cover” between reads of Amazon.com’s most buzz-worthy novel, “Moby Dick,” ever “figure” to be an “old has-been”? Sheesh, someone’s paranoid…

The Hard Way [GameFAQs]