Archive for April, 2005

Apr
30

G4: All Growed Up

April 30th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News, In The Media 0 comments

Before you know it, G4 will be trying on training bras and getting its first period! Is it us or is it blossoming into an actual network? X-Play is tepidly funny these days (darn good Dragon Ball Z: Sagas rant, Adam, we hate to say). “Big C”, that goofy black dude from Street Fury, got […]

Apr
30

So Not Money

April 30th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News, In The Media 0 comments

A Garnier television ad starring Heather Graham prompted us to do an IMDB search on the bottled blonde. Yeah, she was totally crunk in Swingers. But what’s this? She also did voice over work for EverQuest II, along with Mr. Count Dooku himself, Christopher Lee!? Who’s your agent, sluts, the Archbishop Don Magic Juan? 0

Apr
29

Weedend Pop Quiz

April 29th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News 0 comments

Who is Mike Jones? Why is Scott Savol’s fat ass still on American Idol? What is Gizmondo? [GameInformer] 0

Apr
28

Survival Of The Geekiest

April 28th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News 0 comments

There’s an exhibit at the Museum of the Moving Image in Queens, NY, that explores the evolution of video games. Oops, sorry Bible Belters, of course, “In the beginning, GOD created video games.” We slipped! We denounce Darwin! We lick Jesus Fish! It’ll never happen again! Please don’t hurl fire bombs at us like you […]

Apr
28

GameFAQs: All Dressed Up And No Place To Go

April 28th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News 1 comment

There’s something different about GameFAQs … new hair cut? That’s not it. Nose job? No… Oh wait, I know. Its homepage is now puke yellow (swatch appears left)! Neat-o. Hope that encourages even more bile-fueled reviews. Ahh, yes, we found one from yesterday. Here are some closing comments about Xbox’s Star Wars: KOTOR — you […]

Apr
28

Bloody ‘Ell, Governor!

April 28th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News 0 comments

What happens when Prince Charles and his equine wife Camilla finally procreate (sorry, we just threw up A LOT in our mouth)? Namco tries to resolve our quandary in its upcoming FPS for the PC: Hellgate: London is a RPG in the first person perspective set 25 years in the future. Introducing a world filled […]

Apr
27

Intervention Time At The House Of Stile (No. 3)

April 27th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News 0 comments

My God… Stile must be snorkeling around in a pool of Redbull and liquid crack over there as it only took him a week to update his website. Goodie for us, though, ‘cuz that means more flash games including a reality/animated space shooter and a unicycle sim. Oh, and the best one is an interracial […]

Apr
27

Porn! Online! Finally!

April 27th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News, PC Games 14 comments

Jenna Jameson has a new online game where players can interactively “simulate sex” with the world’s most famous porn star — let the premature ejaculation amongst gamers commence! When you “recover”, download a free preview or play the full game for $9.95 on her website. [VirtuallyJenna.com] 0

Apr
27

Ladies, Forget Bra Burning…

April 27th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News, In The Media 13 comments

… in fact, forget bra wearing while you’re at it! Ah, we kid the womens, but seriously: Were you offended by

Apr
26

City Of Heroes

April 26th 2005 by ThumbGods Editor in Game Reviews 2 comments

Why isn’t City of Heroes more fun? It’s a multiplayer superhero game, and yet somehow it’s boring. This is coming from a girl who regularly meets up with a dozen friends for an Abberrant game (for non-gamers, that means we roll dice and pretend to save the world). CoH has it’s great points, namely the […]

Apr
26

EverQuest II and the Flu

April 26th 2005 by ThumbGods Editor in Game Reviews, Gaming News 2 comments

Stick, a candidate for Greatest Boyfriend Ever, got me three months of EverQuest 2 for Christmas. I installed my new game — all 10 CDs of it! It was like an old Sierra game! — and found out that I needed a new videocard. I’d actually just gotten my GeForce 4 when I started dating […]

Apr
26

The Return Of Earthquake’s GI Tract?

April 26th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News 1 comment

In 1997, naive arcade owners decided to give the “Hyper Neo Geo 64 Jamma” machines a try, and Samurai Showdown 64 was one of the platform’s only games. Don’t remember that 3D mess? SNK thanks you for having such weed-damaged brains. But SNK Playmore is giving a next-gen version another go, according to GameSpot: The […]

Apr
26

This Would Be Funny, Were It Not For The Dead Granny

April 26th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News 1 comment

I have a friend that once fell asleep (drooling!) while playing the not-so-thrilling Dungeon Explorer II on my PC Engine Duo-R — but this is ridiculous: Authorities near Sacramento, California say a teen-age driver apparently fell asleep at the wheel after staying up all night playing video games. The car swerved off the road and […]

Apr
24

Trade In Your Pot O’ Gold For Store Credit!

April 24th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News 1 comment

Just when you thought GameStop employees couldn’t get any drunker: Three Irish businessmen have joined forces with video games retailer, GameStop, to roll out the brand in new shops across Britain. The first British GameStop store opened in The Bullring, a futuristic shopping centre in Birmingham, three weeks ago. Irish join video game retail roll […]

Apr
24

Stress Relief

April 24th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News, In The Media 0 comments

Why we’re quoting from a Kiwi paper, we’ll never know. But… The Pentagon has spent US$4m to create virtual reality “video games” that simulate combat situations in Iraq, to help treat traumatised soldiers on their return to the US. The project has been created to help treat the thousands of troops returning from tours of […]

Apr
21

Late Night With Conan In ’06

April 21st 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News 0 comments

Before Ahnold was an upstanding, Mexican-hatin’ Republican, he was acting much more like a Democrat, groping strange women and frolicking about Hollywood in a furry codpiece. Funcom reminds us of Gov. Krazy Kraut’s better days in its latest MMORPG project, Age of Conan: Hyborian Adventures, due out next year. Age of Conan is set after […]

Apr
21

Say Hello To My Little Over-hyped Movie Port

April 21st 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News, Playstation 2 Games, Xbox Games 2 comments

This fall Scarface (no, not the autobiography of Tina Fey, but the mafia movie) is coming to the PS2 and Xbox. Rent it for the false hope that you’re as cool as every D-list celebrity tard on MTV’s “Cribs”, buy it for the racist Cuban-American stereotypes: Al Pacino will be lending his likeness, but not […]

Apr
21

Cartoon Games = Satan’s Renaissance

April 21st 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News, In The Media 0 comments

North Carolina’s bill banning the sale of “graphically violent” and “sexually explicit” games to minors better pass already before America’s impressionable youth get brainfucked by this upcoming filth: Animaniacs [IGN] Teen Titans [Y!] Peanuts [gameindustry.biz] HURRY North Carolina, before Peppermint Patty and Marcie pull something dykey! 0

Apr
20

GameFAQs 101, Lesson 2

April 20th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News, Playstation 2 Games, Xbox Games 0 comments

Want to add that subtle hint of rage to an already angry GameFAQs review? Start it off in Yiddish: Oy…what a game this turned out to be. I, thankfully, rented this game because I wanted to have something to pass the time for a few nights. Too bad that I will never see that 7.25 […]

Apr
20

New Outbreak Of ‘Who’s The Better QB’

April 20th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News 0 comments

VS. Donovan McNabb appears on the cover of EA’s Madden NFL 06; Michael Vick appears in court after allegedly giving herpes to a 26-year-old health care worker. We report, you decide. 0

Apr
20

Student Films: By Us, For Us, Embarass Us

April 20th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News, In The Media 0 comments

Q: Is Michael Highland (shown right) (a) a 10-hour a day video game addict or (b) the darling of Brown’s Ivy Film Festival? A: He’s both — but with the glasses, missing biceps, and the unkempt facial, cranial and chest hair peeking up out of his collar, we’re gonna say 10 hours a day of […]

Apr
19

Landing Strips, To Go

April 19th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News, Sony PSP 0 comments

Is that a PSP in your pocket or are you just happy to read us?: Having conquered the iPod, Playboy magazine is setting its sights on the PSP. The magazine will announce plans Wednesday to offer nude and non-nude photo galleries that have been specifically formatted for viewing on Sony’s Portable PlayStation. Of course, we’ll […]

Apr
19

Nintendo Just Blue Our Minds

April 19th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News 0 comments

The world has a new pope; the Nintendo DS has a new color (“Electric Blue”). Oddly, both have Nazi pasts. [IGN] 0

Apr
19

School Am Fun

April 19th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News 0 comments

When your “college” advertises on late night cable TV, you might be an Art Institute of California student. Ditto if your major is “Game Art & Design”. [gameinfowire.com] 0

Apr
18

Odd Move — If Not Completely Idiotic, Which Of Course It Is

April 18th 2005 by Chris Bunting in Gaming News, Xbox Console, Xbox Games 13 comments

Oddworld’s president Lorne Lanning — who at some point OK’d farting and burping as the main means of communication within his company’s high-concept Xbox games and kept his job — announced that “the future direction of the company is not in the videogames industry.” Good thing they’re moving to Berkeley, CA, where a future direction […]

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